Merry Birthday, David

Can any birthday compete with Christmas?

Today is December 17, my son David’s birthday. That reminds us it’s about a week until Christmas. Better get that tree. And all those other presents!

NOT. It’s usually the exact opposite.

David’s birthday not only occurs at the peak of the holiday prep time, it’s also on the same day as his grandmothers birthday. Lost in a double shuffle.

I want to apologise here and now to my son for never having handled this star-crossed conjunction well. I never asked him how he felt about It, but as a victim I should have known. I was born at two minutes past midnight on New Years Day, 1935.

All my birthdays were spent at New Years Eve parties. After the celebration of the midnight gong, my mom always intruded on lingering kisses to announce my birthday to all, shutting down “Auld Lang Syne” for the birthday jingle. Tipsy people, most of whom I did not know, pressed big bills into my hand. There were no boxes to open until the next morning, and usually they had Christmas wrappings with a birthday tag.

We were careful to keep David’s birthday distinct, but I don’t remember parties with much exuberance. Often we would go out and do something special, but there was that obligatory pause to call my mom with her birthday wishes. It’s all a blur to me. Maybe David remembers it better. We were all so busy preparing for the holidays.

Some vexing questions on holiday birthdays.

Kaitlyn Wylde writing on BUSTLE mentions the 11 things she hates to hear when her Christmas-birthday combo rolls around:

“Do You Want One Big Gift, Or Two Separate Gifts?"

"Is This A Theme A Party?"

"Can It Be A Holiday Party, Too?"

"Did Your Parents Plan It?"

"Does It Suck?"

"Sorry I Forgot Your Birthday."

"That's The Best Birthday Ever!"

"Sorry I Can't Go To Your Party"

"Here's Some Pity!"

"Should We Move Your Birthday?"

"What's To Look Forward To?"

A truncated history of birthday celebrations.

PUMP IT UP, a company famous for making parties with inflatables, describes on its website the origin of birthday celebrations, edited here:

It wasn’t until ancient people began taking note of the moon’s cycles that they began paying attention to the change in seasons as well. From this type of tracking system came the ability to celebrate birthdays and other significant events and anniversaries each year.

Scholars who study the Bible say that the earliest mention of a birthday was around 3,000 B.C.E. and was in reference to a Pharaoh’s birthday…their “birth” as a god. The ancient Greeks, believed that each person had a birth spirit who kept watch and had a mystic relation with the god on whose birthday that particular individual was born.

As a tribute to Artemis, the lunar goddess, the Greeks would offer up moon-shaped cakes adorned with lit candles Which symbolized the sending of a signal or prayer. Blowing out the candles with a wish is another way of sending that message to the gods.

The Greeks, like many other pagan cultures, thought that days of major change, such as these “birth” days, welcomed evil spirits. They lit candles as a form of protection. In addition, friends and family would gather around the birthday person and protect them from harm with good cheers, thoughts, wishes, noisemakers and gifts.

The Romans were the first to separate birthdays from pagan experiences. Regular Roman citizens would celebrate the birthdays of their friends and family members. Any Roman male turning 50 years old would receive a special cake baked with wheat flour, olive oil, grated cheese, and honey. Female birthdays were not celebrated until about the 12th century.

The first Christians considered birthdays to be pagan celebrations of evil. It wasn’t until the 4th century that Christians abandoned that way of thinking and began celebrating the birth of Jesus, Christmas.

The Germans in the 18th century introduced the kind of parties we now have, Kinderfeste, which was held for German kids and featured a birthday cake adorned with candles. Kids were given one candle atop the cake for each year they had been alive, plus one for the hope of living for at least one more year. Blowing out these candles while making a wish was a big part of these celebrations.

Sugary cakes were a birthday commodity only wealthy people had access to for quite some time until the Industrial Revolution made the required ingredients more widely available. This, in combination with advances in mass production, allowed bakeries the option of offering customers pre-made cakes at lower prices.

The tune for the Birthday song was created by sisters, Patty Hill and Mildred J. Hill, Kentucky school teachers who wrote a song called “Good Morning To All” in 1893. Robert Coleman published a songbook in 1924 that substituted Birthday lyrics. In 1933, this new version was popularized in an Irving Berlin musical. One of the founding Hill sisters sued Berlin for on the copyright violation. They won the case and the copyright still holds to this day, estimated at around $2 million a year.

When your birthday coincides with another holiday.

Holiday season birthdays probably occur in all families. My daughter Terri is on July 16 when people are still glutted on holiday barbecue. My stepdaughter Jen is on January 3. My sister-in-law Pam is on Jan 7. My brother Tom is on March 18, the day after the St. Patrick’s day alcoholic blitz. Birthdays on and around holidays are diminished not enhanced.

But the worst is Christmas. One gift blends into another, and after December there is not another day of gifts to anticipate during the year.

So in conclusion, today I wish my son David the happiest birthday ever as he prepares to make a new life. I am on the other side of the world now where Christmas is celebrated on January 7, which means the month of December is now all his.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAVID FROM ME AND OLGA. LOVE YOU TO PIECES.